Having to help with an older child comes into my role under certain circumstances. For example, if I am booked for 24-hour support or a welcome-home package, some families ask me to arrive before the due date so both parents can be at the birth and there is an extra pair of hands at home. I can also help parents think about how to include the older child in everyday newborn care, so the focus is not only on the baby, but also on the older child who suddenly has to share the mother’s attention. This can include protecting time for the older child with mum, time with both parents, and then family time with the baby included too. It is not general childcare, but I can support the family around the emotional adjustment of bringing a newborn home.

Transitioning from one child to two is about the whole family dynamic. It can affect the older child, the mother, the couple, the home routine, sleep, attention, and the way the family works together. I can help parents understand what to expect from the older child, how to protect their routine, how to keep quality time with each child, and how to set up the home in a way that works better for everyone. My main focus is still the newborn and the postnatal period, but that is closely connected to the mother and her transition into being a mum of two. Many mothers also carry fears around loving one child more, not having enough time, or feeling stretched in two directions. These are normal things to talk through, not things to hide.

Most second, third, or fourth-time parents know exactly why they are asking for help. They already understand how much work goes into one baby, and then they have older children waking up, school runs, routines, emotions, meals, bath time, and everyday family life still happening. Many experienced parents do not need me to teach every little thing. They need sleep, support, and someone who understands newborn nights without making them feel like beginners again. I also remind parents that they are still a couple, not only mum and dad. If the setup allows it, I am happy to support the newborn while parents take a little time together, even if that just means dinner and a quiet conversation.

I have worked in many staffed households, including formal homes, fully staffed homes, international families, and high-profile households. I am comfortable working alongside nannies, housekeepers, PAs, drivers, chefs, and other staff when everyone understands their role. Clear communication helps the household run better, especially when a newborn arrives and the whole rhythm of the home changes. One thing I do not offer is wearing a formal uniform.